January 2012
26 posts
I'm kind of upset because of a past memory..a bad...
well then…time to cry myself to sleep and figure out what I’m going to do! :)
Teaching myself braille and morse code :)
You may not believe it but I believe that everyone...
You might find it to be unnoticeable or unrecognizable but I can see it. Everyone is so caught up in being the most attractive woman/man in the world. Everyone wants to have everything. They long for money, good looks, and whatever everyone wishes to have. People need to realize that you cannot have everything you want. Life does not work that way. There are times when you have to let go of...
I do not like the fact that I look like a kid...
True Grit.
I'm quite picky when it comes to how I want things...
You know my name, not my story.
I am not a perfect person nor am I stunning or appealing to other peoples eyes. I am just a simple regular girl who strives for a great future. I have tried doing my best to fit in with the crowd but I am not that person. Some despise me. Some talk trash about me. Some even treat me like I am invisible. I have never fallen in love with anyone except for one person. I have no intentions on falling...
There just isn't enough time in the world.
So many things to do yet so little time.
There are a lot of things I regret doing but I do...
Happy Birthday Brother,
It is going to be your birthday in about 32 minutes. You are turning 14 now. I hope you know that I really love you and you make me happy. I do not know what I would do with you. Do you remember? Do you remember when we were babies and we were each others childhood best friends? I remember every single moment of my life that I spent with you. I cherish all of these memories and I hope you do too....
"You're so chill and laid back"
“Laura, you’re so chill and laid back” says a friend of mine. To be honest, I am not a chill and laid back person. I am actually a very stressed out, worrisome, and frustrated person but then I try to get rid of the stress, worries and frustrations by chilling and being laid back….pretty much, not giving a fuck. People always ask me why I do not care about things as much...
I blank out a lot.
Whenever I would blank out, the cause of it would usually be my brain disorder that I had. Now, if I blank out, it would be because my mind is wandering off again…thinking and wondering about things. When I blank out, everything around me becomes pitch black. I wouldn’t realize anyone looking at me or talking to me until about 5 to 10 seconds later.
I am looking forward to the future.
I am very excited for college. I know that college life will be tough since there will be more responsibilities and work to do. Of course I will complain about it later on but then even if I do complain, I am very determined to be who I want to be. I am very determined to do the things I have always wanted to do. My future life plans are already set and all I need to do is achieve them and make it...
I fear a lot of things but the one thing I fear...
I feel like I can lose anyone in any second of the day. It frightens me. I was always afraid of losing people ever since I was a little girl. Here’s a childhood story:
When I was in pre-school, my father would take me to the nursery all the time. I was afraid that my family would abandon me so I held onto his hand tight so that he would not leave me. I cried for hours, literally. Sometimes, I...
1 tag
Things I must do when I become 21.
Go skydiving.
Go deep sea diving.
Go paragliding.
Go to a shooting range, practice my aims and achieve the title “perfect shot”.
Take my brother out to a club, bar, lounge..anywhere when he is 21.
Go on a road trip with my friends.
Go on a road trip with my family. (brother, sister, cousins only.)
(to be continued…)
A group of friends whom I can call "family" that...
No matter how many times we may fuss and fight, I want us to be able to forgive each other in the end. I want a group of friends who will always be there for each other and for me. When there are times where we may not be able to talk as much, I want us to be able to stay close to each other. If anyone in the group were to be in another state or country, I would like us to stay close to each other...
All I want is a family.
I do not need love but I do need to be loved.
I do not need friends but I do need someone to be there for me once in a while.
But what I do need is a family, whether it is blood related or not, I will always need a family. I cannot live without my family because that is what my life is really about. All I want in a family is for everyone to be happy, respect, trust, be honest and tolerate each...
Sorry. This blog is only for people who read. If...
I am not saying this to be mean. I am only saying this to give you a warning about this blog. Haha :)
I like military men.
I wouldn’t mind dating a military man because I know that I would never give up on him, cheat on him or do anything to heart him. Dating a military man is a challenge to me and it is a challenge that I accept because I know that in the end, I will win. You see, I am not the type of person to date someone in the military and cheat on him or give up on him while he is deployed. The distance is...
Loved&Lost.
We have all been there before. We have all loved someone and then lost them. We might have lost someone we loved because of someone else, constant fights between each other or feelings might have changed. There are many different kinds of outcomes when it comes to relationships but there will always be that one person that will always be on our minds. The fact that we have lost someone that we...
Once my eyes are shut, it is frightful for me to open it again. For all I know, so many things can happen in a blink of an eye. You just don’t know it yet. There is only so much that the naked eye can see. With our mind working constantly, it is possible that one can see one thing and another can see another thing. The way the human body works is quite magnificent yet fearful because of what...
I am afraid to lose people.
I always have been. Ever since I was a little girl, I was afraid that my parents would leave me. I was afraid that whenever we went somewhere and they left me alone for a second, I was afraid that they would never come back for me. I am still afraid of losing people but I do not understand why I am still afraid because I have lost so many people that I never wanted to lose in my life. All I can do...
There is quite a lot of things that I find interesting and most of these things are things that I wish I knew how to do. For example…
- I would love to learn about cars inside and out because I fucking love cars ♥.
- I would love to travel the world because I like to go to other places for their landscape, food and culture.
- I find surfing somewhat scary but I would not mind trying...
For new years, my family and I will be driving up to Montauk to pray and watch the sunrise at the beach. I wasn’t planning on praying because I usually do not pray but then I changed my mind. I think I will pray because I feel like I need to this time because I am really grateful for all the people I have met and having been born into a wonderful family. Thinking about this also gave me an...
Goodbye 2011 and hello 2012!
This year (2011) has not been entirely good to me but I have had some few good moments. I have changed quite a bit. I no longer fight with my lovely brother and I am no longer the same person as who I used to be. I like this new and updated version of me. I have been quite upset in 2011 but then everything changed in a couple of months. I have overcome some dilemmas and now, I am a happier person....
December 2011
15 posts
1 tag
The meaning of my tumblr name, "Cerveau".
The word “Cerveau” means Cerebrum in French. I chose the name Cerveau because the cerebrum is where all the thoughts occur. The cerebrum facilitates complex behaviors such as thought, judgements, learning, memory, speech, language and social interactions. I also felt that the word “Cerebrum” is to plain and boring, so I switched it to French and came up with...
There is a whole lot of words on my page but this...
So what?
What I want in a man...
I want a man who is strong. A man who will fight for me and defend me. A man who is muscular but not too muscular. A man who really listens to what I have to say. A man who will respect my decisions. A man who is not afraid to show me off to his friends. A man who is proud to have me as his woman. A man who will let me be in charge at times. A man who will cook for me, love me for who I am, care...
ALL THESE UNANSWERED QUESTIONS HAVE BEEN ANSWERED!
I feel good now :) teehee! <3
Friends are meaningless if you do not know who your true and real friends are. I was just like that. I never knew who my true friends were and I still am unsure of it too. It is hard to come across a friend who will be there for you, deal with you at your best and your worst, and someone who will be honest and trustworthy. That is why I become very picky with whom I become friends with. Not only...
Every time you come across my mind, I have a whole bunch of things I want to tell you. There are so many things that I wish I could talk to you about but that seems impossible since there is no communication between us and I have no way of contacting you. Please don’t be like this. I know that there is a whole lot of good in you and I know that you wouldn’t ignore situations like this....
These unanswered questions are taunting me.
Right now, I am uncertain of my feelings. I do not know how I really feel and what is going on in my mind but I am still kind of offended by your actions. I do not want to interrupt the both of you and I do not want to get on your bad sides. I know it has been quite a while now but all I want to do is get things straight but neither of you are giving me the chance to do so. Now, speaking in...
Apparently looks do matter. When people “fall in love” , it is obvious that he or she looks for the personality, perhaps height, and usually the way the other person looks. If one were to look for a man or a woman to love, he or she would definitely include looks as a main priority. Some might say that they do not care about looks but that is usually false. The ones that say they do not...
You seem like you don't care.
And that’s what bothers me the most about you. I’ve been hurt by your actions and you do not even bother giving me an explanation. You left me hanging like I was nothing. I am filled with unanswered questions that are waiting to be answered. Why can’t you give me at least a minute of your time to set things straight? I honestly am sorry if I’ve done anything wrong but right now, I am very...
We've got a whole lot of misunderstandings between...
And quite frankly, I am happy with it.
I have been fucked over so many times that nowadays, I do not have the heart to give a damn about anyone. My heart used to be filled with happiness, love and joy but now, my heart is filled with empty spaces. I feel nothing in my heart and if I do feel something, that feeling will be so faint that sooner or later, it will disappear. All my so called “friends” are not my friends. I...
People seem to think that I do not know what I am...
You were all that I wanted.
You were all that I ever wanted.
You were all that I ever needed.
You were the only one that I truly loved.
You were my best friend.
You were all that I could ever ask for.
You were my one and only wish for every christmas that came by, every 11:11’s that came by, and every year on my birthday.
You were the only one that came across my mind whenever I looked up into the beautiful sky.
There are people in this world who tell me things...
I do not know if anyone has noticed but the kind of fashion I like and would wear are the ones that are reblogged onto my other tumblr account (ilauralee). I would wear those outfits but at the same time, I feel like I shouldn’t because some of those clothes are kind of revealing and I do not have the confidence to be seen in those kind of outfits. I like to keep myself covered up because I...
November 2011
30 posts
This mask that I wear is a smile and thoughts that...
I am unable to express or spill out my feelings with the right words. To be honest, my feelings are…well, that’s what I would like to know because I do not know how I feel. I cannot tell the difference between being sad, angry, hurt or any of those kinds of feelings. I don’t know why but I have come to a theory that I am unable to express how I truly feel because throughout my...
All alone but its okay.
I have been damaged more than once and I am still recovering. Many people have broken my heart, hopes and dreams. I was depressed about it but I never allowed myself to let others see a frown on my face or know that I am hurting inside but day by day, my anger and my sadness grew and grew until I could not hold it any longer. The best way for me to express my feelings was by writing but that is...
I'm so caught up on making my life become a...
My life IS important but I was so caught up in it that I didn’t realize who and what was much more important. I focus on myself so much that I do not realize how my parents or my siblings are doing and what is going on in the family or what is going on with my friends. From now on, I’m going to appreciate my family and friends but at the same time, I am going to continue to focus on my...
Sometimes, it feels like you don't even care about...
It feels like you don’t feel the same way as I feel about you. I try my best to keep us together as friends but I feel like, for you…its another different story. It feels like you don’t want to be good friends with me. Why is it that everyone I care about always ends up pushing me away? Maybe I should stop caring and loving people. The people that mean the world to me are the...
Everyone has flaws and everyone is beautiful. Fuck...
My little brother is my life saver.
I remember that I went hiking with my brother one time and I almost fell backwards off the mountain but my brother grabbed a hold of my hand and helped me back up. He’s my life saver and I love my little brother
Some people aren't worth fighting for.
So don’t even bother trying because no matter what happens, it’ll never work. No matter how much you like them, or want to know them, it will never happen. The best solution to it is to let it go and have no regrets or spites. It isn’t worth it.
It's easy for me to let go.
I’m able to let go of things so easily because if I don’t, I know that I’ll end up hurting inside. I’m able to let things go because I don’t have the heart to care about things when people always let me down or hurt me without having to lay a finger or say a word to me.
Why did I even bother trying?